The Big Bang Theory

It’s been said that no man is capable of being one hundred percent honest. There was always that one instance, that one moment where it was more convenient, more sympathetic.. it was just easier to fib a little bit. You tell your boss you loved their presentation, when to be completely honest?... Your ADD went “HD” in the opening credits. You tell your mom that you were at your buddy’s place studying... and by studying you mean the female form of a certain hot co ed, that happened to be staying in the same vicinity as the aforementioned friend. And while you may not be the brightest guy on the planet, even you know the answer to the ever elusive question: “Does my ass look fat in these jeans?” And may the Lord help you if you so much as hesitate.

But, have you ever been at a crossroads in life, where you just needed to buy yourself a little more time to think? So, rather than telling the truth, you start telling little white lies?... At first, the little white lies are just that. There was no bad intent. They were never meant to hurt anyone, only to protect others feelings. They are for your own good, or so we are told. But really, is there such a thing???

Maybe you lied about one event. One single detail. So what, right?... Well guess what? Then you find yourself having to lie just to cover up the original one, and another to cover up that one. The nasty snowball effect only gets bigger and bigger as it rolls downward. Eventually, the lies become an entire story, one so twisted that even the most skilled of authors will forget the original lie, not to mention the intricate details you gave along the way. And that is when you get it… the massive explosion in your face.

I’d like to think of this as the Big Bang. It’s when all the lies and deception come to a fruition, and guess what kids?... The jig is up. Sure, you could continue to hold your stance, and vehemently deny the accusations. Think… “I did not have sexual relations with that woman… Ms. Lewinski.” Or “I never took steroids, Mr. Senator.” But at the end of the day, what doesn’t come out in the wash… only stains the dress. And the guy that steps to the plate with a Mardi Gras head and Raisonettes is… “OUT!” (with ump hand motion).

Then again, you could always come clean. They weren’t lying when they said the truth hurts, but there are certainly ways to cushion the blow. And that beats getting caught any day of the week.

Society has taught us, that some forms of lying are perfectly acceptable.. I mean, look at American politics!!!... But lying is never acceptable on a daily basis, and certainly not to the ones we love. They deserve a higher level of respect than your coworkers, your buddies, and even your own mother. Because while your mother will love you unconditionally, and your buddies’ attention span will eventually allow him to forget why he momentarily hated you… your significant other loves you by choice. And if you can’t be honest with them, well… then who can you be???....

All lies do is create stress. They create problems in other areas of our lives. They make your place an absolute mess. They gave you a huge zit in the middle of your forehead that people begin to mistake as an undeveloped Siamese twin. And ‘cause you to look so disheveled, that even the homeless man is trying to give you a dollar.

That is why I believe in brutal honesty. People may not always like what I have to say, but at least they know I wasn’t BS’ing them. I’d rather have someone hate me for being honest, than adore me for telling them lies. I’ve learned many lessons the hard way and had to hurt others before I realized that in order to have adult relationships.. I had to become an adult. Maybe that, and I realized… I am a terrible liar. And unlike many other learned skills.. you can’t learn to be a good liar. Becoming a good liar doesn’t come with practice, but with comfort in what you’re doing. People come to see it as a possible option, regardless of how small the issue may have been in the first place.

Uncovering the truth all at once, only leads to the Big Bang. The lies come to a head. The @#$! hits the fan. You were standing in a fireworks factory, and your dumb ass self had to have a smoke. What a crappy liar never considers, is that if they had told the truth all along and diffused the heat over a period of time, rather than letting it all come to fruition at once, they could have avoided a major loss.

Trust is one of the hardest things to build, yet one of the easiest to destroy. What do you do when the damage is done?.. When trust is lost??... Some choose to throw up the white flag in surrender-- to be so forthcoming with information, they might as well be reporting to a parole officer. While others, choose to simply ignore the incident and they never really learn a lesson. But in each case, no one really wins. The victim will always remember this one instance. And the liar will continue to lie. And that’s no relationship I want a part in.

The best way to avoid all of this?.. To just tell the truth. Sure, these types of relationships may seem like a myth, some… urban legend if you will?.. But, what if you could find that one person you could just be yourself with?? They’d accept you as you are… flaws, mistakes, quips, and all. And that is the best kind of relationship there is. Because the rest of your life is a long time to spend being something other than yourself.

March & Madness

I felt like starting this blog with a little bit of Rockapella's "Where in the World is…." But I decided against it as to not date myself. So the past few months have left me barely enough time to sleep, let alone blog. I have spent countless hours on planes, trains, and automobiles, going from one end of the country to the other in pursuit of my dream. It's funny, because even I am not quite sure what that dream entails but I do know that I love to entertain people. I love to make them laugh, to make them feel wanted, and make them feel like a part of my life. Because when you start to spend as much time on the road as I have, complete strangers don't seem so strange anymore.

To give you a quick wrap of how things have gone down during my blogging hiatus, I will start by saying that my stint with the March Madness show for ABC/ESPN was a huge success. I got to travel all across the country and meet some of the greatest coaches in the sport today. In fact, for those that thought I was a curse, I'll have you know I visited every single school that made it to the final four. Who's your daddy, now??...

I also made the trip out to Arizona for the Super Bowl, attending some amazing parties. But my main purpose for being in AZ was to help my friend Christian, AKA "Spot" from the Covino and Rich Show on his quest. For those of you who don't have Sirius satellite radio you are missing out on either one of the funniest bits in radio… or most pathetic excuses for a dating life, depending how you look at it. Spot is 27, lives at home with his mom, is an (under)producer at Maxim radio, and oh yeah… hasn't had the company of a woman in… well, we aren't quite sure. Not to say Spot isn't a catch, because he is probably one of the most honest, genuine, selfless people I know… but he definitely lacks that boldness to go out and get the girl. So in an attempt to motivate Spot to go out and find the woman of his dreams… Covino and Rich challenged Spot to the "Million Hand March." I won't go into the specifics of what that entails, but you can learn more about it here. Oh yeah, and if Spot failed this mission… he agreed to have his head shaved like George Costanza from Seinfeld.

But in a land filled with professional athletes, celebrities, and some of the hottest women on the planet, did a guy like Spot have a chance in hell?... While in AZ, me and the kids attended some of the coolest parties, namely both the Maxim and EA parties. The EA Madden party was a blast, pitting some of the most talented athletes in the NFL against a few average Joe's such as myself… and seeing who had the skills to be crowned the Champion of EA's Madden game. In the end, Willis McGahee took home the prize, while the rest of the room took home a hangover. But it was well worth it.

The following night was the Maxim party, which is without a doubt one of the biggest parties each year at the Super Bowl. Covino and Rich broadcasted from the red carpet, while I scoped out the scene inside for Spot. The situation looked pretty bleak, but by the end of the night Spot seemed to be having some success. Did Spot actually get his groove back.. if he ever had any that is??? Or did he end up looking like one of the three stooges???...

Luckily for you, Covino and Rich brought along their Director Sami J to videotape all the shenanigans as they went down. So without further ado.. here is part one of Maxim Radio & Rapido Production's "On the Level 2."

Watch On the Level 2 Part I

Watch on the Level 2 Part II

My stint in AZ was short lived however, as I wast called away to the West coast for my ABC taping. Somewhere between the late night partying, flying on airplanes with screaming children, and trying to shoot two campuses worth of footage in under 9 hours, I ended up coming down with viral meningitis.

If you look up the definition of viral meningitis, I am pretty sure it will say:

Viral meningitis- n. absolute misery.

Thousands of miles away from my family and friends, I spent Super Bowl Sunday at the Marina Del Ray hospital. In between the score updates via text, as there was no television in the ER, I managed to get a gazillion scans and 2 spinal taps. All I can say is thank God for morphine: It may have made me hallucinate, but it definitely eased the excruciating pain in my back and neck. So while I lay alone in a hospital bed, the rest of the country was watching in awe as an underdog named Eli Manning showed the world they had underestimated him and his teammates. And that is how I missed arguably one of the greatest Super Bowl upsets in my generation's history.

Just because you're sick doesn't mean the rest of the world stops for you to recover. Three days later, and against the advice of pretty much every rational person I know, I continued my college tour for ABC. I spent the next two days in the 7 mile stretch between two of the NCAA's greatest basketball teams: Duke and North Carolina. It figures I would be privileged enough to finally make this a stop on my college tours, and I was so doped on pain killers I barely remember being there. So after being on the road for close to two weeks, my producers made the decision to send me home, and I headed back to Tampa to recover.

For a good ten days, I had multiple personalities it seemed, depending on the pain and how well my body was reacting to the medications and drugs. Unfortunately, viral meningitis is just one of those things your body has to deal with on its own. Fortunately, there are other meds to help you cope with it until it does.

The day I left for Tennessee, I was actually starting to feel like Jenn again. Don't get me wrong, I still had the occasional aches and pains, but at least I didn't feel like my body was falling apart anymore. The mic packs they put on my lower back were absolutely miserable, but I somehow managed. I spent a good portion of my two days at Rocky Top, hanging with the team, Bruce Pearl, and as always my kick ass crew. The guys really took care of me, and made sure that coming back to work wasn't ridiculously stressful. It certainly didn't hurt that Tennessee beat Arkansas that night either.

With the last of my college stops wrapped up, I was free to go about my merry way. Since then, I have made several trips back and forth between NYC and LA taking various meetings, and considering different projects. I'm still mapping out my future, but rest assured that I'm hanging in there through the ups and downs. My personal life has seen its share of turmoil, but that happens any time you have to make choices about where you're heading in life. That is why I am so thankful for my family and friends who have continued to support me through it all. The transition from college to the real world is never an easy one, but when it's put under extraordinary circumstances the fear of failure will get to anyone.

I've made sure to take time for myself, to gather my thoughts. I spent some time recently at Grove Isle in Miami, which is about as secluded as it gets without leaving the main land. I caught up with old friends, met some new ones, and really just took time to regroup after the whirlwind I've experienced the past few months. So, for those of you that have stuck it out, and wonder where I had gone… rest assured.. I'm back and ready for duty.

Hopefully by now you have all gotten to see the awesome special E! put together for the Top 20 women of the Internet. And thank you all for making me a part of it. If you didn't catch it yet, make sure you check your local listings or my Youtube channel. Believe me, it's worth the watch.

Thanks for stopping by. And you'll be seeing more of me… real soon.

Muchos Besos…

Jenn

The Choices We Must Make

My life has been primarily consumed by sports the past few years, so forgive me if I reserve the right to talk about my personal life on my space. Why shouldn’t I?... I mean.. it is MYspace. I’ll do with it as I please. Besides, if you can’t talk about life with your friends, then when can you?...

I have been getting a lot of comments and notes about my status updates on MySpace, mostly out of concern for my feelings. It’s weird, because most of the people that write me, are people that have never even met me. They’ve merely seen a picture or read a blog, or if they were really bored watched a video. But most of you have never had to see me at my worst. And believe me, in the course of the past few years, there have definitely been some “worsts.” You know the look… make up (if you’re lucky) strewn down my face, hair in shambles, probably in my pajamas, eating a bowl of Ben and Jerry's til my ass fills itself out again. Pretty pathetic, right?... Those are the days I find myself actually Mapquesting bridges to jump off of, and actually weighing the pros and cons of each… like which has the better view on the way down. And then I realize… damn… Lutz is really lacking some decent bridges. So instead, I sit on the computer and come to MySpace. Lame, sure. But what else is a girl that spends her days consumed by the internet supposed to do?...

Not to be outdone by “the book of face,” and my original medium.. MySpace added these features that let you show people what your mood is. They even give you a space to leave a note. Mine are usually something goofy.. like a terrible movie quote, or the lyrics to a cheesy song. But lately, I have just been feeling uninspired to leave anything creative. My mind and heart have been totally preoccupied with obstacles I am facing in my own life.

Every now and then, we all come to that point after college, where our decision making skills are often put to their toughest tests. You know, that crucial gut check every person has to have in their twenties: The “Where Do I Go From Here” choice. And despite the crazy journey life has taken me on in the past few years, it still hasn’t made my decision making process any easier in regards to the direction I want my career to take. Hell, most of the decisions I have “made” in the past few years weren’t really all that thought out. I just did what seemed like the “right thing at the time.” Then, there were times I had to make decisions, and didn’t… and now look back wondering what I may have missed out on.

Aside from the typical job questions we ask ourselves, most of us also struggle with personal relationships with people in our lives. We struggle with ghosts of our past, people in our present, and dreams of our future. The problem is many of us make the mistake of letting the real thing pass us by, simply because we are too scared to take a leap of faith. Life is all about taking chances on people, places, opportunities… on just living. I’m no different. It’s the classic case of personal happiness versus professional fulfillment. Many of us call our inability to make decisions ‘patience’, and that is just selfish. You can’t tell the rest of the world to slow down just because you can’t keep up, just as you can’t tell it to stop so you can get off. You just have to hold on for the ride.

In the town of Vegas people make mistakes on the daily, but that is what gambling is all about. Risk. Those who wish to double their money, raise the stakes. Those that are content with their accounts the way they are, keep their money in their pockets. But when you ask a gambler why he gambles, he says it’s for the thrill of the risk. It’s not all about the money. Sure, the payoff is nice, but in the end money is just paper. And where’s the excitement in that?

If people are willing to gamble on colors, and cards… then why not take chances with their own lives?..It’s aggravating that so many people don’t ask out that girl at the bar for fear of public humiliation. They don’t go to that job interview for fear of rejection. They don’t turn in class projects because they can’t stand in front of a crowd. Instead we avoid making the decision all together. When you have to make a choice, and don’t make it… that in itself is a choice. So what if you fail?... So what if your friends say I told you so?... You can only live your life for you, because after any decision… whether it is wrong or right.. comes a calm. You may not have made the right decision, but at least you committed to a cause. And rarely are there choices in life that can’t be reversed with enough hard work and commitment.

Even during my days at Sports Illustrated, it amazed me that people ACTUALLY wrote in to get advice from a 22 year old girl. What the hell did I know???.. How was I supposed to help them solve their predicaments?.. I was 22.. I could barely pick out a pair of shoes to wear let alone make decisions that could have lasting effects on my life. But that’s just it. Maybe they really didn’t want my advice, they just wanted someone to talk to. Someone to listen. Maybe I didn’t have all the answers, but if I could give them any reassurance of their own thoughts, or maybe play devils advocate with them.. then my mission was accomplished.

Man is the only living being that is able to choose its own destiny. Seeds become plants, because it’s what seeds do. Puppies become dogs, because it’s their natural progression. But we have the ability to mold the course of our lives by our choices and commitments to them. That is how you attain a higher level of personal fulfillment. Besides, no one ever achieved greatness by hesitation.

Good decisions are made from experience, and experience is made from bad decisions. It’s all a part of finding your way. Life is the sum of all our choices. Some may leave you “in the hole,” while others can make you rich beyond your wildest dreams. Being able to make decisions, puts you in charge of your life, and in that… you can find the freedom to make your life whatever you so choose.

So quit living your life like you meant for no one to notice. Hit Control B on your life. And live it with purpose… because with great risk, comes great reward.

Jenn Sterger Video Sneak Peek - New Photoshoot

ADMIN UPDATE:

Hey all!!

Just got finished editing a new short video giving her fans a "behind the scenes" look at what her new upcoming photos will be like...they were shot in North Florida this past week and should be ready to load up to her website and myspace galleries soon...

Can't wait? Check out this sneak preview and let us know what you think!! Enjoy!




Also, if you haven't checked out Jenn's new You Tube channel, take a look...it has all of her previous work consolidated in one place for your enjoyment!

Catch the E! Special replay Monday March 10th

ADMIN UPDATE:

Hey all,

If you didn't get a chance to see Jenn on the E! special Byte Me when it premiered Saturday, no worries...it will be replayed this week as follows:

Monday March 10th - 1PM and 8PMEST
Sunday March 16th - 5PM EST

So catch the replay and let us know what you think!!

Also, Jenn will be traveling again very soon, so keep checking back for updates!

Thanks!

Byte Me premiers Saturday March 8th 5PM EST on E!

ADMIN UPDATE:

Hey all!

Just a reminder that the E! special "Byte Me - 20 Hottest Women of the Web" premiers this coming Saturday March 8th at 5pm EST!! Tune in to see Jenn featured among the hottest women you will find on the Internet.

In case you can't tune in and watch the show during it's network premiere, no worries!! As with all things on E!, it will be repeated a few times during that week. Show times include:

Saturday March 8th - 5PM EST (Premier)
Sunday March 9th - 12PM EST
Monday March 10th - 1PM and 8PMEST
Sunday March 16th - 5PM EST

So tune in and tell your friends!! Enjoy!!

Here is the official release from E! Network:

Sexiest Women on the Internet - According to E!
E! HEATS UP YOUR INTERNET WITH THE SEXY CYBER SPECIAL
"BYTE ME: 20 HOTTEST WOMEN OF THE WEB" PREMIERING SATURDAY, MARCH 8 AT 5PM ET/PT

Two-Hour Show Counts Down The Web's Most Successful Broadband Beauties And How They've Parlayed Online Fame Into Lucrative Careers

Los Angeles, CA, February 20, 2008 – They're smokin' hot, simply seductive and only a mouse click away. They are the Web's sexiest cyber-babes and they're about to steam up your television screen. Tune in as E! takes a look at these 20 virtual vixens who are taking the celeb world by storm, spicing up search engines, dominating the downloads and naughtily networking their way to the technological top. It's a new form of star-power with main stream appeal, career success and internet hits coming together to produce this ranking of web-based phenoms. Boot up, log on and sit back when "Byte Me: 20 Hottest Women of the Web" premieres Saturday, March 8 at 5PM ET/PT on E!

Catch Jenn LIVE tonight broadcasting from the Maxim Super Bowl party!

ADMIN UPDATE:

Don't forget to catch Jenn broadcasting live tonight for Maxim Radio on Sirius channel 108...with replays all weekend long (see post below for details). Broadcast starts from Arizona live at 11PM EST until 3AM...

Also, Jenn has been in Arizona since Wednesday and has already had the chance to check out a few Super get-togethers...here are some links to the Chad Hastings show where she appeared Thursday and Friday and talked about her Super Bowl experiences to date:

Thursday's show - Click here to listen - Jenn is on at about the 22:35 mark, talking about her upcoming trips and the game events, followed by Will Carroll (short interview with Jenn)
Friday's show - Click here to listen - Jenn is on at about the 24:45 mark, talking about the EA party the night before (long interview with Jenn)

So hope you enjoy!! We'll have updates as they come!!

Super Bowl, College Basketball and Maxim Parties – The Sterger Tour 2008 is On!

ADMIN UPDATE:

Hey all! After speaking to Jenn this morning and hearing her upcoming schedule, she’s got so many updates for this week, it’s gonna make for an exciting read…so lets get started!

• It’s Super Bowl week! And that means two things – Super Bowl parties and lots of travel for Jenn. This week, Jenn is off to Arizona to cover some of the preliminary Super Bowl Events for Maxim and Sirius Radio. The big event will be this Friday, with Maxim’s Live Super Bowl party, hosted by Covino and Rich of Maxim Radio. Maxim Radio will broadcast live from the party at the grand opening of Rande Gerber's Stone Rose Lounge at the Fairmount Scottsdale Princess with interviews from the red carpet starting at 11 pm ET. Jenn will be there as their special live Correspondent Interviewer. You can catch Jenn’s Celebrity Interviews Live Broadcast this Friday February 1^st, 2008 on Sirius Radio Channel 108 from 9PM to 1AM Mountain time (11PM to 3AM EST). And if you can’t listen live, you can catch the replays all weekend on Sirius channel 108. Rebroadcasts will air Saturday Feb 2nd at 3AM, 11AM and 7PM and Sunday Feb 3rd at 7AM, 3PM and 11PM.
  
• Be sure to read Jenn’s behind the scenes inside scoop on all the Super Bowl events and the hottest Super Bowl parties in her upcoming articles on NFLGridirongab.com website
• Last update we announced that Jenn was traveling to various college basketball venues to shoot segments for ABC”s “The Race to March Madness” show. Her travels so far have taken her to Memphis and Indiana. The first episode will air nationally this Saturday February 2^nd @3PM EST. The rest of the "Race to March Madness" shows will air on ABC @ 3:00pmET - Feb. 9, 16 & 23 and Mar. 8 & 15. Be sure to check your local affiliate listings for the ABC channel in your area!
  
• In addition to the weekly national ABC broadcasts, Sprint will also have additional behind the scenes video downloads available from her on-location shoots as a part of their Sprint Mobile TV service for Sprint subscribers. Be sure to check those out as well!
• Speaking of cellular, be sure to check out your cell phone carrier’s screen background selection. Jenn has exclusive photos available for download to your cell phone on most major mobile carriers.
• March 8^th is coming fast! Be sure to set your DVR’s to record E! Entertainment’s special “Byte Me: 20 Hottest Women on the Web “. The show will be broadcast nationally that Saturday at 5pmEST.
• Jenn’s Myspace page has gone thru an extensive renovation and it looks amazing. The page is locked and loaded with all kinds of new stuff so be sure to check it out…and be a friend!!
• The Galleries pages on her personal website have been updated as well, with background changes and all new photo selections coming very soon.

Lastly, Jenn wanted to take a second and thank the great people of the Seminole Club of Greater Orlando. They invited Jenn to come down and speak to the members on January 10^th. From all accounts, the event was a big success; from the larger than expected crowd to the large number of brand new members who signed up that night and joined the club! All of the money the club raised that night goes back to FSU for supporting Florida State athletics. So, to the SCGO, thanks again for a GREAT event!!

That’s it for now…keep checking back for updates on Jenn’s trip to the Super Bowl and other announcements!! The Sterger Tour 2008 is just getting started!

A Resolution to Resolve

I’ve pretty much given up on the idea of making a New Year’s Resolution. Let’s be real. We all say we’re gonna give up that one vice: drinking, smoking, eating Twinkies and entire jars of peanut butter. But seriously, who keeps those kinda lofty goals?... You’ll drink after a long day of dealing with useless, obnoxious coworkers, smoke after…well, whatever it is people smoke after, and consume mass amounts of junk food because let’s face it.. girls “eat their feelings.” Sure, I could say I am going to spend more time at the gym… but then I would have to have my mail forwarded to “Treadmill 3.”And, I could also say that I will blog more often… but let’s face it: You can only bitch about bad trades and men so long before it becomes a little passé.

Then, I started looking through old family photo albums and trunks of Sterger memorabilia while collecting the framework for a future project of mine. It was a scrapbooker’s worst nightmare realized: random photos of random people in random places… in complete and utter disarray. In a word… a cluster@#$%.

These albums had everything. There were the embarrassing baby bath tub shots, where I could have definitely landed the gig as the Michelin Tire man’s infant daughter. The kiddie pool pictures from my grandparents house in Miramar when I was maybe 2.. where it was so hot.. my mom didn’t even bother to put me in a bathing suit. Me getting my first taste of the open road (or neighbors sidewalk) in this sick power wheels Jeep the parents got me, that actually caught on fire thanks to my father’s weak attempt at a do-it-yourself supercharger. And of course, enough Sterger family vacation photos to make even the Griswold’s look like amateurs.

It was a regular “This is Your Life Jenn Sterger” photo montage. But there was something missing. Where were all the high school years?... The project specifically called for pictures from my high school prom and of course from my Marching band days. I searched for hours on end through box upon box of stuff but all I came up with was a serious case of the sneezes from all the dust. Then, it dawned on me. I hadn’t checked “The Suitcase.”

When most girls say they have baggage, they mean it in a more figurative sense, like bad memories of being humiliated in front of their childhood crush, or the first time a boy broke their heart. Mine however, was literal … BAGGAGE: An ugly, green suitcase, buried underneath my bed, behind several pull out drawers of shoes. Until Monday that is.

I had all but forgotten the bag even existed. I mean, it had been buried there since 2002, and I really saw no need to dig up my past. I really had no idea what I would find in this suitcase of swootness (which for those of you who don’t know… is the exact OPPOSITE of sweetness), but I knew it wasn’t going to be pretty. That’s because my high school experience was anything but. A series of not so nice boyfriends, a roll call list of frenemies, and of course a non-existent social life outside of the safe haven that was band practice. As I cracked open the case, I was opening my own Pandora ’s Box.

Amid a pile of dried up corsages, a graveyard of greeting cards, and a heap of handwritten notes… there it was. The Truth.

It was like an archaeological dig through my unresolved personal issues. The “best friends” that disappeared the minute things got tough. The popular kids that pretended to be your friends, only to make you the punchline of a sick joke for their own personal amusement. There were the old photos of boyfriend’s past: The fellow band geek, the jock, the drunk, the stoner. It was like “Win, LOSER, draw” THE HIGH SCHOOL EDITION. Each one was totally unique, but all divided by a common denominator: TRUST. It was because of these men boys, that I built the largest wall since the days of the Soviet Union. And why shouldn’t I?... Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice shame on me. And well, I had been fooled more than that.

But it wasn’t the pictures of the Ex’s that caught my attention. It was more the pictures of myself. I was a chameleon of sorts. I was the preppy geek in the Band shirt I had designed myself. I was the awkwardly shy girl in her boyfriend’s letter jacket sitting at the top of bleachers. I was the trendy clothed sober girl that looked ridiculously out of place in a sea of the beautiful people. I was.. the outsider.

I had changed my look so many times by the time I had graduated; even I had no idea who I was anymore. My appearance never stayed the same for too long, because I was so eager to please others. I was so afraid to disappoint… that I had given up on just being myself. The sad thing was… it didn’t stop at high school. It was still happening.

I let the past dictate who I am, and how I portray myself to the world far too often. And while my exterior has changed, not much else has. I’m still the same insecure dreamer I always was… constantly seeking approval from others. It has affected my family, my friendships, and my love life. I’m scared to trust anyone based on the way others have treated me, and let me down. And while I don’t expect people to feel sorry for me, I do ask for empathy and understanding.

As my trip down memory lane was ending, and I neared the bottom of the case… I discovered a randomly misplaced DVD. I’m sure it had accidentally been tossed in there with all the garbage in one of my mother’s “Clean your frickin room” rampages. I turned the case over.

Random. But appropriate. It had been my ‘go to’ movie during hardships with boys. Maybe because it offered some kind of hope that a guy could like me for all my quirks and weird idiosyncrasies. I put the movie on in the background as I continued organizing my new photos but found myself quickly distracted. And then… it happened.

You know the part…

“I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.”

That was it. THAT was my New Year’s Resolution. I would put the past where it belongs… behind me. I would move forward with my life, but not forget where I came from. I would learn from the people in my past, but realize the ones in my present shouldn’t pay for their mistakes. I would learn to trust again, because it’s the foundation for so many of life’s relationships. I resolve to be nothing but myself. And if a guy doesn’t like it.. so be it. But at least I would know… who I was. And that.. was really all that mattered.

As I finished up my project, I looked back down at the suitcase beside me. I knew what I had to do. Gathering all the photos and garbage around my room… I crammed the last of my bad memories into the green abomination and carried it down the driveway. And then… I finally did what any person looking for a fresh start does with their unwanted baggage: I checked it with the next day’s garbage.

Maybe its best that “old acquaintances be forgotten, and never come to mind.” If all they did was prevent you from becoming a better, stronger you. We tend to live in the past because most of our life is there. But really, the past is behind us to learn from it. The future is in front of us to prepare for it. But the present is here. So why not live it?... After all, life is a sum of all of our experiences. And while I suck at math…I resolve to make my answer a positive number.

“Never regret the things that once made you smile…. Because at the time.. it was exactly what you wanted.”-- Anonymous

Some upcoming events to feature Jenn

ADMIN UPDATE:

Hey all...just wanted to drop a few tidbits about some things coming up for Jenn in the very near future:

1) Hopefully a lot of you caught Jenn on ABC's Christmas special "Holiday of Stars" that was shown nationally on Sunday December 16th...The special was a look back at the year in entertainment, plus celebrities' favorite holiday memories...Jenn was one of the celebs who got to answer questions with their opinions on "Athletes and their Significant Others" and "Athletes on the Naughty and Nice list this year"...

Well, ABC and Intersport liked what they saw! We are happy to announce that Jenn signed an 6 week deal to work on ABC's "The Race to March Madness"!! Jenn will travel to a different college powerhouse each week to film some background features on college basketball's biggest games this season. You can watch each week live on ABC at 3PM every Saturday starting February 2nd thru March 15th.

Jenn's first assignment takes her to Memphis, Tennessee this week. I have a feeling Graceland may be in the near future for the Sterger Tour 2008! Keep checking back for more information on her upcoming schedule.


2) We reported last month that Jenn was chosen by E! Entertainment to be one of the featured celebrities in their upcoming special "Byte Me: 20 Hottest Women of the Web". The E! crew was in Lutz in November shooting the video feature and interview for that special (of which I still owe you guys some sneak peak pictures I shot of the event)...I just received conformation of the air date straight from the good folks at E! Look for the special to air on Saturday March 8th @ 5PM EST! I believe it is a two hour special, so set your DVR's for a fun event!



3) Also this coming Thursday, 1/10, in Orlando, Florida, Jenn has been invited by the Seminole Club of Greater Orlando to speak to their members about her thoughts on recent happenings with FSU and what's on her plate. If you are a Seminole fan in the Orlando area, come on by and hear the latest on FSU news!

Sample Jenn's Sprint Video segments right here!

ADMIN NOTES:

Hey all! I am just a posting machine lately!

Last week we announced (and linked) the official press release from Sprint regarding their new Mobile TV service and features for Sprint subscribers with video enabled phones. Jenn is a significant contributing partner for this new service, and through her arrangement with Intersport out of Chicago has been actively filming regular segments for fans to download onto their Sprint phones.

I have received a large number of emails to the website accounts, both from non-Sprint subscribers asking how they could check out what these segments look like, as well as Sprint subscribers who wanted a preview. Well, have I got the answers for you!

Below are some sample sets of the first group of videos that Sprint has graciously allowed us post both here and on Jenn's Myspace/Facebook pages. As I myself am not a Sprint user, this was my first chance to see these as well, and they are great!! So check the videos out below and let us know what you think:


Jenn Reports from the Opening game of the 2007 NFL Season from Indy:
Sprint Video - Checking out the Colts new digs

Add to My Profile | More Videos


Best Baseball Movies? Check out "Tenn" with Jenn
Sprint Video - Tenn with Jenn

Add to My Profile | More Videos


USF Beef Studs Tailgate
Sprint Video - USF Beef Studs Tailgate

Add to My Profile | More Videos


The Ultimate USF Tailgate
Sprint Video - The Ultimate Tailgate

Add to My Profile | More Videos


Running With the Bulls
Sprint Video - Running with the Bulls

Add to My Profile | More Videos


Life in the USF Student Section
Sprint Video - Life in the USF Student Section

Add to My Profile | More Videos

So, as you can see, although these videos were from September/October 2007, Jenn is really having a blast making these segments!! What could have been better than not only covering your hometown team during it's early season phenomenal run, but also allowing her fans to see what Gameday is like for her??

Anyway, enjoy!

Watch out!! Jenn's out and about this week!!

ADMIN NOTES:

Hey all...just wanted to do some quick updates to Jenn's schedule as promised...it's been a very busy week so far, and it keeps getting better.

On Friday November 2, the crew from E! Entertainment Top 20 Hottest Women of the Internet was in Lutz shooting footage of a brand new photo shoot Jenn was doing for the special. After the photo shoot was complete, the crew moved back to Jenn's home to film her interview portion that will also run during the show. (Hopefully soon, I may be able to post some sneak peek photos I snapped of the event).

The rest of Jenn's schedule this week consists of the following:

November 5-7 - Jenn will be in Chicago shooting some new segments with Intersport for her Sprint Streaming Video features. I am told it will be a lot of fun and worth the wait!
November 7-9 - Jenn will be back up in NYC on business, and maybe a little fun..:)
November 9-10 - Jenn will be up in New Jersey on business as well.

As more details become available for appearances, I will be sure to update the blog accordingly.

Thanks!! Look for another entry very soon with links to the Sprint Videos for those that do not have Sprint video enabled phones.

Two Exciting Announcements

ADMIN NOTE: Hey all...just wanted to update everybody about two very cool new things involving Jenn. I think everybody will be as excited as we are about this news!!

1) SEE (Sprint Exclusive Entertainment) Launches as Only Network of Original TV Programming On Mobile Phones - Jenn has partnered with Sprint Wireless to be an online host for their new network of original TV programming exclusively to Sprint video-enabled phones. You will be able to watch Jenn provide analysis on various sporting events across the country on your Sprint cell phone. This exciting opportunity has allowed her to travel to different cities in the past months, attending both college and NFL football games so she can provide her unique brand of pre-game and post game insights. I will try to update her blog as her travel schedule becomes available in the near future. So keep an eye open, you may see Jenn at an sporting event in your town soon. (Click on the link to view the official press release from Sprint). If you are not a Sprint subscriber, you can still most likely access pictures of Jenn, as well as her ring tones, on every major cellular carrier.

2) E! Entertainment's Top 20 Hottest Women of the Internet - E! Entertainment will be in Tampa in the near future to interview and shoot footage of Jenn for their January 2008 TV special on the Top 20 Hottest Women on the Internet. Since her first national TV appearance on Labor Day 2005, Jenn's popularity has only continued to grow. Her national appeal has not gone unnoticed by many others in the media. I know Jenn is extremely grateful to all of the fans that continue to contact her thru her email and other media formats. As more news and/or links on this become available to me, I will be sure to update the site accordingly.

Also, for those people who want to read Jenn's latest article (and her archived stuff) on NFL Gridiron Gab's site, here is the direct link to her archives.

That's it for now...Thanks everybody!!

On Truth and Rumors Part 2: Running with the Bulls?...

You know you’re living a pretty pathetic existence when you take great pleasure in spreading untrue rumors about others. Why?.. Is your life that uninteresting?... Are you that bored?... Do you have no friends.. to the point where your mother tied a bone around your neck just so the family dog would play with you?..

Maybe. Or maybe its just pure jealousy.

There have been no less than ten blogs that have popped up over the past few days regarding my appearances at various college football games other than Florida State’s. The most recent ones of course are the ones saying that I’ve thrown my alma mater down the stairs for “greener” pastures, namely the University of South Florida. Since once again you have proved you neglect to do your homework, I guess I can take time from my busy “bandwagoning” schedule to poke a few more holes in your story and fill them with some real facts.

Since graduating from Florida State this past summer, I have been spending a lot of time in the Bay Area. In fact, I’ve pretty much lived in Tampa my entire life. So of course I have a ton of friends down here that go to either Hillsborough Community, International Academy of Design and Technology, and oh yeah.. the University of South Florida.

For those of you that took the time to read my back story, I went to USF for my first two years of college. My parents were afraid that if I just up and left for school that the big mean world would just chew me up and spit me out. They thought I just wasn’t ready to experience the real world yet. I attended my classes, fought for parking spots, and pulled in decent grades, all while holding down a job and being a nanny for a special needs child. This of course, left little time for having an actual social life.

I really had nothing but love for South Florida. They had great instructors, great classes, and were expanding at a rapid pace. The reason I left really had nothing to do with academics, though that’s hardly the excuse I gave my parents. The fact is that I was sick of living at home, sick of seeing the same people, and sick of well.. monotony. I’m sure if I would have joined a sorority or lived on campus, that most of these problems would have been alleviated. But Mom and Dad saw no reason to pay for an apartment while I was living 10 minutes away from the University. And I really couldn’t argue with them. So, the only way I could move out and get my own place is if I left for school.

Enter: Florida State. I guess you could say an even bigger reason for me going to FSU was my rendition of “Good Will Hunting” Syndrome: “I went to see about a boy.” But as most relationships at that age do.. this one fell to pieces about a year after I transferred. It wasn’t really until then, that my college experience began. I was forced to go out, make new friends, and make a separate identity for myself than what everyone else new me as.. “so-and-so’s girlfriend.”

And then, Sept 5, 2005 happened. The Cowgirl was born.

So now, after years of studying, partying, and attending the church of Bobby Bowden at Doak Campbell Stadium… I have returned to my roots in Tampa. With me traveling a good portion of the month, it just didn’t make sense for me to go anywhere else. Why pay rent on an empty apartment?... Who would watch my cat when I was away… though she really seems like she could give two @#$%’s?... When would I ever get to see my family?...

Tampa was just the logical explanation.

Being in Tampa certainly hasn’t slowed down my career any. I still have plenty of irons in the fire… so much so that I am overwhelmed on a pretty consistent basis. And the majority of them revolve around my one true love: College Sports. And I just so happen to be living in the surprise Mecca of them all.

Unless you have been living under a rock or are living your life in a complete miserable denial, you know doubt have noticed a new face in the Top 25 10: The South Florida Bulls. Things have changed pretty dramatically since I was a student in these here parts. For one, the campus is crawling with all kinds of student activities, most of which were just getting started when I was there. Then there’s the off-campus housing. It’s amazing what a few years can do in terms of real estate. I hardly recognize the area around the University. Then of course.. there’s football.

What Jim Leavitt has accomplished over the past few years with this program is nothing short of remarkable. So why wouldn’t their rise through the rankings be a huge deal?..

I have tons of friends in both the athletic departments as well as on the team, so of course its only natural for me to support it when I’m around and available. I’m happy for the Bulls and how their program has blossomed over the past few years. Their administration and athletic department has been nothing but accommodating towards me, and have even gone so far as to thank me for it. But, I have in no way turned my back on my Seminoles. In fact, the majority of the time I have gone to the Bull’s games was in a working capacity with different companies I free-lance for. I’ve attended other school’s sporting events too. And… GASP… even worn their colors. But how quickly we forget these things. (see photos)

In fact, the pictures you used to document your so-called findings are over a year old—when the bandwagon was more of a Volkswagen. Kudos for using some of the most recycled material on the net. Hell, you didn’t even bother to give photo credit to SportsIllustrated.com for it. Nice job douche. Next time try to find some more recent photos to document your findings.

Hell.. I’ll post them here. I have nothing to hide. These are from a couple weeks ago—two girlfriends of mine asked me if I wanted to go to the UCF game dressed up. I understood what I was getting myself into, and hell.. even stopped to talk football and do the chop with FSU fans I saw throughout the day. So make no mistake… my address says Tampa, but my heart says Tally.

I’ve gone to plenty of FSU sporting events in the past year—including last weeks travesty against Miami. Sans hat. I know that’s a crazy concept for some of you to grasp, but sometimes I just want to enjoy the game and forget the hoopla. Don’t worry, the garnet and gold were still in abundance.

Last weekend proved to be a long one as far as college pigskin was concerned. I attended both the Rutgers/USF game and the Florida State/Miami game. It’s not like I am keeping my agenda a secret.. hell, I talk about the games I go to on the radio and television all the time. I guess you’re saying if I ended up at Kentucky last weekend to watch the Gators.. then I am a homer’ also?.. Who’s to say I am not showing up just to see if Tim Tebow’s therapist has helped him come to grips with his emotional instabilities from the LSU game?.. Crying???.. There’s no crying in College Football.

I had business to attend to in NYC, which so happens to be a stone’s throw from Piscataway, New Jersey—where last Thursday night’s match-up was arguably one of the best games in college football this season. I made a lot of friends last year when I visited the Scarlet Knights for the Louisville game. Hell, that game may be one of the greatest upsets I have ever witnessed, barring of course the Boise State/Oklahoma game from last year, and of course Miami/Florida State 2005. It was great to finally take in a game with everyone, and see how far both teams have come since they met last year in Tampa. Though USF was favored by the numbers, history just didn’t bode well for the Bulls. Let’s face it. Any time this season a ranked team has played an unranked team on a Thursday night on enemy turf… well, let’s just say things didn’t go so well. In fact, going back a year from now… Louisville was ranked number 2 going into a similar match up on a Thursday night.. and how did that end?.. EXACTLY. And as usual, Piscataway was rockin, and when Rutgers fans get behind their Knights, they are pretty much unstoppable. Thursday night was a rough one for the Bulls, but nothing they can’t recover from. We’ll see how they fair this weekend against UConn.

Miami/Florida State will always hold a place near and dear in my heart, even though the game didn’t really have the same significance it had in recent years. A game that used to determine Championships is now two teams struggling to find and assert their position in the ACC. Saturday night’s game.. was heart-wrenching. Just when you think you’re beginning to find your rhythm, the boys from the 305 pull the rug out from underneath you. Not that anyone should really be surprised. Whenever Miami’s manhood has been questioned this season… they have always seemed to rise to the occasion. I guess there are a few plus sides to Saturday night’s outcome: The green couch survived another year. My father and I are back on speaking terms. And.. we didn’t have to splurge for a new TV at Best Buy. Now.. if my Noles can just get their swagger back.. that would be great.

As you can see I haven’t switched teams. I’ve simply given props where props are due. So here’s to you Mr. Wanna-Be-Guido hairdo. At least my boys in Jersey know how to rock theirs. I mean, your hair is so greasy, you make Steve Lavin look like an amateur. . You like apples?.. How about them apples?.. And BTW… How bout them Bulldogs?.. Nothing???.. As for your fake boob material.. it’s really tired. I pretend my boobs are about as real as Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy combined. I doubt I could even fool Stevie Wonder into thinking they were made by God. But you know what they say.. if you can touch ‘em.. then they’re real.

The bottom line is I am an avid fan of all things college sports. And there’s nothing I love more than college football. I’m a fan of the underdog. I hate blow outs. If you could give me football 7 days a week, I might be the happiest girl on earth. It’s all about competition, drive, and heart. Pigskin is a passion, regardless of the colors it comes in.

So really..

Don’t have a cow bull, man.

The Power of the Internet: On Truth and Rumors

This week has been an interesting one to say the least. I’ve been bombarded with phone calls, texts, and emails from friends asking me if “what the Internet said was true?” So I guess it’s time for me to sit down and put some rumors to rest.

Earlier this week, I was awakened to find the first of many emails that would read: “Is this true?... I’m sorry girl.” Unaware of what they were referring to, I opened the link. There in bold print was the title: “JENN STERGER FIRED FROM SI.” The commentary that followed was probably some of the most inaccurate and albeit brutal statements that I have read about myself on the web to date.

I won’t give this site anymore free pub than it has already received, nor will I resort to their level of bashing they chose to wield upon me. I will, however, state the facts from the fiction.

"JENN STERGER'S CAREER AS SI CONTRIBUTOR IS FINISHED:
**** has learned that Jenn Sterger has been fired by SPORTS ILLUSTRATED."

As it stands now, my contract is still in effect with Sports Illustrated. It was a one year deal to provide them with content (in the form of both articles and video) for the SI.com division. The fact is I have not received the Donald Trump Treatment. Currently, I do not have any future assignments slated with them. I am still in good standing, still speak to the editors I worked with there, and will hopefully have an opportunity to do more work with them in the future. Until then, I am permitted to do freelance work for other media outlets at my own discretion.

"The silicon-implanted canary, who was discovered by a downblouse-rousing ABC football cameraman, was an esteemed columnist on SI.com (alongside Rick Reilly and Frank Deford) for over a year."

Do your homework man… it was a garnet bikini top. It’s not like I pulled a Girls Gone Wild or anything.

"But you'll be happy to know she's landed on her feet …. She’s joined the staff of something called NFL GRIDIRON GAB."

This is true. Over the past few months, I have done a small amount of free-lance writing for other sites as favors for friends and acquaintances in the sports industry. I’m experimenting with different styles of writing and blogging. I’ve found working with new groups of people has offered me good constructive criticism and a chance to improve at something I really enjoy doing. NFL Gridiron Gab has allowed me to talk candidly about my fantasy football obsession and focus more attention on pro sports. While my work is mainly with pro sports on this site, I make no disputes that I am partial, and always will be, to college sports, until someone proves me otherwise.

Another site I have had some fun on is run by a friend of a friend, I guess you could say. These are the kinda guys I like to sit around the bar with and cheer/curse at my various sports teams. They figured, ‘Why not have me write like that?’.. My favorite “sparring” partner, Max Seltzer and I have teamed up with MoreCredible.net to do this season’s college picks, while simultaneously taking jabs at one another. Basically, it’s not over until the season is, or until one of us cries.

There are plenty of other things in the works that I am super excited to be a part of, so… I’ll be sure and keep you posted in the future.

"Well, she's no longer with SI and has never surfaced in any other sports magazines - but she has provided plenty of bathroom entertainment thanks to her nudie pics in Playboy."

Again. BUZZER. Granted the majority of my work and photos are on the net, (after all.. isn’t that how this whole crazy thing started anyway?) but I’ve also been in print numerous times, whether it’s just a casual mention in my alma mater’s season preview or a throw-back picture from seasons past. I’ve done interviews, written articles, and posed for various photo shoots. Try Maxim’s Hot 100, Athlon, Florida Football Magazine, and Lindy’s. I've been a guest on Maxim’s Sirius radio channel on the Rich and Covino show a couple of times, including live with their show celebrating the Maxim Top 100 party in NYC. I have also done a ton of national and regional radio and podcasts including: Dan LeBatard, Dan Sileo, Mike Irvin, Dave Kaplan, The Sports Pulse with Grant Thompson, Rivals.com on Sirius Radio, JMV the Drive, NFL Gridiron Gab, and many ESPN affiliates across the country. And in almost all of these interviews, I talk sports, I give my opinions and, most importantly, after they speak to me and figure out “Hey, she knows what she’s talking about!” I get asked back….every time…

As for the infamous Playboy pics or lack thereof… so what?... Was it good for you?.. Glad you enjoyed it!! But Buddy, that was the May 2006 magazine Top Ten Party schools feature that was shot 6 months before the actual photo ran. It was one shot. One boob. Get over it. My Playboy experience was awesome. The company is a great one to work with, and it has definitely opened doors for a lot of people other than me. To say I have no credibility based on the fact I chose to pose for one photo in a reputable men’s magazine is absolutely ridiculous. As for future dealings with them?.. It’s certainly not on the top of my list of priorities at the moment, but you never know. As for the hater references to me getting involved in porn?.. Thanks, but no thanks. I can think of other things I would prefer to do with my career than have orgasms for a living. Of course, to each their own.

"Sterger has also been furiously auditioning in L.A. over the past year for any and all reality shows that will consider her. And we're happy to report that although she hasn't landed any of those coveted roles, she does appear as a tramp (go figure!) in an anonymous online trailer for a film about a fake, male cross-dresser."

This statement made me laugh the hardest. Reality TV???... Is this a JOKE?... Last time I checked I didn’t meet the usual requirements for being cast on a reality TV show:

1) You must be classified as morbidly obese, and be willing to admit you are a fat @$$ on National Television.

2) You must have attended rehab at least twice. Three times qualifies you for an All-Stars special of whatever the theme is.

3) You must be single, desperate, willing to get drunk, and cry about the fact that the man of your dreams (whom you just met three days ago) has yet to give you a shrubbery, backstage pass, or a gold clock to get you to the next round.

4) Be capable of living on an island and live in make shift tents with teams of backstabbing manipulative @#!$’s that all want to douse your torch, kick your @$$ off the island, and take your money.

5) Be one of seven strangers, picked to live in a house, have your lives taped, and find out what happens when people… get super drunk, cheat on their significant others, and talk about how people just don’t “get” you.

As of right now, I weigh about 110 pounds. If that is what anyone considers obese, then damn, society’s standards are steep. I have never attended rehab, nor do I have the habits to be forced to do so. While I may be single, I am certainly not desperate. Aside from Trista and Ryan, not too many people have had success finding their soul mate on National television. Though… I will admit their attempts at doing so are pretty entertaining.

--Damn, I guess this really puts a damper my plans on being the future Ex Miss Flav. Can I at least keep the clock???..—

As for living on an island. Yeah, right. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve got nothing against getting a little dirty every now and then. Physically… I am in pretty decent shape, but by no means am I Xena Warrior Princess. But, hunting my own food?.. No Air conditioning?.. No deodorant?.. Where do you people draw the line??..

I’ve been living in the real world my entire life, and if people can’t be real in “real life” then what makes you think they will be any less fake on television. Backstabbing, bitching, and bar fights?.. No thanks, I went to college. I stayed all four years (and then some). Diploma please!

So, as you can see I’m not really a candidate for reality television. Really, I’m flattered you considered me but I’ll have to decline the offer to make an @$$ out of myself on National television. Now, Dancing with the Stars?.. Another story, because this white girl could use some rhythm!

It’s these feelings I have for reality TV that made his statement hilarious. In my opinion, the funniest “fact” he presented was that I was “furiously auditioning” in LA these past few months, as if I nothing better to do then to fly out and stand in line for various auditions. Truth is, yes, I have flown out to LA 3-4 times over the past year, but in every case it was the result of legitimate business offers for interviews that came to me either through Facebook, my email accounts on my jennsterger.com website, or from my agent at UTA. Anyone who knows business knows the importance of creating the social and business networks needed to start out with any career. Each offer was checked out in advance for legitimacy before I set up appointments. So I’d fly out for a week and meet with different people while I was out there. FYI, I also did the same in NYC, but no one seems to care about those meetings.

The movie trailer they speak of is for an independent film "Devo Brown" by Poison Apple Pictures. They’ve won a lot of awards and acclaim for their first film ‘The Bonnie Situation’, and now they are in the process of funding their new project. I’ve become good friends with many of the people involved with the project, and shooting the trailer was a nice diversion from work and school. The film isn’t about a cross dresser, it’s about a guy pretending to be gay so he fits into the fashion industry. Think Zoolander meets Chuck & Larry. It’s an off the wall, over the top comedy like most independent films that come out of Jersey (since the birth of Kevin Smith). Basically, I just wanted to do something different for once, and working with the kids at Poison Apple was a great experience.

And for the record, I don’t play a “tramp,” I am credited as Man Eating Bitch #1. Get it straight.

That’s what I love most about the internet. People can twist what you say, do, write... all to fit their needs and little private agendas. Bias much?.. Kinda like when videos of me, answering an FSU class’s questions (at the invitation of the instructor) about the representation of female bodies on the internet, were posted on sites as if I was a dumb bimbo giving a random lecture on boobs. It was never meant to be shown as just that. I never expected it was going to be posted anywhere. It was just me… and a class of freshman students talking about life in college, how being on the internet changed that, and the pitfalls to what I was experiencing by sharing my life online. Nothing was off limits, and why should it be?.. I have nothing to hide.

WHAT?.. My boobs are fake?.. And the earth is no longer flat?.. Thanks Captain Obvious. You can go shave your back now.

Anyone that has met me in person knows I am as brutally honest as it gets. I don’t pull any punches, and sometimes border along the line of being politically incorrect. I can’t help it. It’s a witty, sarcastic sense of humor that’s developed from being treated like one of the guys. The problem is.. I rarely write what I would love to say. Why?... For fear of offending anyone.

I’ve always been a people pleaser, it’s my nature. And above all else, I hate drama and confrontation. For someone that got to where she is today almost solely on the power of cyberspace, I rarely read anything about myself online. A lot of it is usually split half and half between haters and admirers, but regardless I’d just assume not read it. If it’s too defamatory or completely false, someone usually brings it to my attention anyway. If people disagree with what I write, or how I present myself… they usually don’t hesitate to write about it. And THEIR opinions MATTER. That’s the thing about opinions though. They’re kinda like buttholes. Everyone’s got one.. and they all stink.

I’ve come to the realization over the past two years that not everyone is going to like me or what I do, and I’m okay with that. I can’t get pissed because someone isn’t a fan, or get upset that they are obstructing my development because they don’t approve of what I do. That would be a little self-serving don’t you think? Instead I respect their opinion, while at the same time ask them to keep an open mind. They may not like the way I dress. Or the way I write. Or perhaps they are upset that I have been given the opportunities I have. And that is fine. All I am asking from people is to keep an open mind. Society today is pretty divided when it comes to plastic surgery and physical appearances. I dress the way I do.. because I can. I work out, I stay in shape.. I take care of myself. What’s wrong with being proud of that?.. I write the way I do because I write the way I speak. It’s conversational. I’m not a literary genius, nor do I claim to be. It’s not like I’m trying to write Shakespeare!!!.. It’s usually something to just distract you from your chaotic workday, give you a point of view you may not have considered, or just make someone laugh. I’m not asking haters to “like” or approve of what I do, but I am asking for tolerance. Life doesn’t have to be full of drama, and meaningless bashing… so why bother?..

Thank you to all the family, friends, and fans that have stood by me these past two years and for those of you who continue to have my back going into the future. It’s people like you that keep my head up and smile bright even when the haters try to pull me down. Whether I’m decked out in my hat and boots, or laid back in my pajamas watching football with my festively plump feline… I’m still the same person I’ve always been. Only a little older, a little stronger, and a little wiser.

Because as we say in the Locker Room…

“Those that mind don’t matter, and those that matter don’t mind” –Dr. Seuss.

Oh the Places You’ll Go..

This past week has been the first week I have actually gotten to sleep in my own bed instead of a hotel room for a month. That’s because I have spent more time in planes, trains, and automobiles than any person should. Normally, I’d be blogging away about my adventures, but honestly there really hasn’t been much down time, and when there was, I was spending it with my friends and family that I have neglected for far too long now.

The month of July began with a bang, and not just a metaphorical one. July 4th landed me in Orlando and Daytona with a few of my girlfriends over at the Pepsi 400. Yes, I have an addiction. The following week I spent in Chicago, both for the race and to take in a ball game at the legendary Wrigley field.



In my 23 years on this planet these eyes have yet to see anything that comes even close to the beauty that is Wrigley. Sure, franchises across the country are clamoring to build their brand new state of the art stadiums. But not the Nothside of Chicago. No. They have instead proclaimed their hundred plus year old stadium a landmark. From the old fashioned score board to the Old Style beer to the in-house band, Wrigley field is what America’s past time is all about. The outfield wall isn’t pimped out with ads for Viagra or auto accident repair shops, it’s just covered in a simple green vine and two tastefully placed UnderArmor ads. And I kinda liked it that way. The outfield itself is very picturesque, not to mention the creative seating that the surrounding buildings have added themselves on the rooftops. One of the buildings actually has a roof painted like a Budweiser bottle. Genius marketing if you ask me. And the best part of the day was getting to share the experience with my dad, my friend Will Carroll and his wife Barbara.



The following weekend I spent cruising the Big Apple with my friends Sara and Gavin. Friday night Sara and I were guests of the Yankees as they hosted my hometown team the Tampa Bay Devil Rays. Our representative from the Yankees showed us around the ballpark and even gave us a tour of Monument Park. If you haven’t been to a Yankees game, you must go for this very reason. It was great seeing people of all ages finding their favorite players among the “Greats” that had their place in the park. A couple of the Rays players that recognized me from the Tampa games waved as I walked past during warm ups. I can honestly say some of them looked a bit confused when they saw me in the stands with pinstripes, but it didn’t stop them from being friendly. After all, I still have nothing but love for the Rays, but you know what they say about..”When in Rome…?” Well, the same definitely holds true for… “When in the Bronx.” That night, the Rays handed the Yankees their only loss that entire weekend.

The next day after a run through central park (or I should say brisk walk, right Gavin??), I headed to Weehawken, New Jersey to take on my first acting role in an independent film by Poison Apple Pictures. I had an absolute blast working with the cast and crew, not to mention the trailer came out great. I really can’t wait to get started on the rest of the project, so stay tuned for more updates.

After another brief stint in Chicago (and of course a random Sox game), I headed back to my father’s hometown of Indianapolis for the Busch Series at O’Reilly. Will, Barb, a few friends of theirs, and myself met up for dinner Friday night and talked all there was to talk about regarding sports issues and of course catching him up on my latest travels. Saturday was spent primarily at the track, where I helped present a check for Checkers Rally’s pit stop challenge. I absolutely LOVE hanging out in pit row; it sure beats bleacher seats any day of the week! Plus, I get to try out my ever-popular shirts I bring to the track. Everyone seems to be huge fans. This most recent one got laughs, but nothing compares to “Boogity Boogity Boogity.”

The next morning I boarded a plane super early for New Orleans to meet up with some friends for the AFL’s Arena Bowl. San Jose finished off Columbus early in the second half, but it was still great game to watch. Arena football reminds me a lot of college football… minus the school work of course. The fans are super loyal, and the players themselves play with the utmost heart. Sure they can get a little “passionate,” and in the heat of the moment try to “drop” somebody against one of the walls… but hey, that’s what competition is all about, right?..

The following Tuesday I was finally back in Tampa. It felt good to crawl into my own bed, and snuggle up next to my cat… who by now probably had gotten used to the extra space, though she didn’t seem to mind having to make room for me. So now, as football season approaches, I am gonna take the next few weeks to just lay low, and get geared up for fall. My apologies for the absence… and it’s great to be back..

Catch you guys real soon. ;)

Besos, Jenn.

ADMIN NOTE: Check out Jenn's appearance in the promotional trailer for Poison Apple Pictures' Divo Brown